Values / Compassion

Compassion

Attending to someone's suffering and letting what you notice change what you do.

What this value tries to protect

The wellbeing of people who are struggling, and the sense that being in difficulty does not make you invisible.

Healthy expressions

Noticing distress before it is announced.
Offering the help someone actually needs, not the help you prefer to give.
Staying present with a problem you cannot fix.

Possible overextensions

Sparing someone a truth they needed.
Helping in ways that keep a person dependent.
Spending yourself past what you can sustain.

Common tensions

Compassion and Honesty
Compassion and Fairness

Questions worth sitting with

When did kindness make you less than truthful?
Whose suffering is easiest for you to overlook?
What help have you offered because it was easy to give rather than useful to receive?

Compassion is often treated as the opposite of judgement. It is closer to the opposite of indifference — it asks you to notice, and then makes a claim on what you do next.